We interrupt this week's optimist message for a minor crisis of philosophy

A few weeks ago the big boss at work said I was too happy. And a few minutes later someone used the adjective "bubbly" to describe me. Between the two I was mildly disturbed, but I let it go.

Since then I had been wondering (especially in my quest for balance): Is too much optimism a bad thing? Can it be used as a defense mechanism? Is it synonymous with delusional? In other words, is denial more than just a river in Egypt?

I know it's "normal" to be sad sometimes. But I never said I was normal. I've just been wondering if maybe, in my journey toward the less extreme, I should consider being less optimistic.

As if to answer my question, a coworker put a quote from Mahatma Gandhi in front of me yesterday:

Keep your thoughts positive, because your thoughts become your words.
Keep your words positive, because your words become your behavior.
Keep your behavior positive, because your behavior become your habits.
Keep your habits positive, because your habits become your values.
Keep your values positive, because your values become your destiny.

I still have the question in my head, but it made me feel better. Thanks Gandhi!

Radar Love

For whatever reason I woke up a few mornings ago and read my good friend's horoscope. It seemed to be pertinent to her--all about new learning opportunities and such (she just started school)--so I sent it to her. She emailed me back saying, "This morning I woke up thinking I should ask you to send me my horoscope."

Last night I thought: My boyfriend should start the dishwasher. Two minutes later, he did.

This morning I was listening to a really silly pop song while writing my sister an email. On a whim I included the name and artist of the song, thinking she might like it. She later told me that she had an 8 a.m. dance party because of my email.

My friend and I have a phrase for these sort of things: It's weird but it's not.

We are all connected. If you listen to the "weird" impulses in your brain and believe what to some is unbelievable, you can all become mind readers.

A letter to my 18-year-old self

I was inspired by this blog post to write a letter to my younger self. Here's a picture of who I am writing to:

That's me on the right.

Dear Rebecca,

You don’t know me, but I am you. I am writing to you from about 12 years in the future. I know you have an active imagination, but you still may have trouble grasping that. Just know that rolling your jeans is coming back into style, the planet is still in one piece (barely), and thankfully people are still listening to The Cure.

I have thought about a lot of different things to say to you. I like to write, as you know, and this letter could be miles long. I wonder if you would devour it or toss it aside to read when you had “time.” I’d like to think your rabid curiosity could sustain your interest, but you’re in high school right now, so let’s be realistic. You have other things to do.

I thought about telling you to pick your writing teacher’s brain, to not start smoking, and to skip the math major bullshit, but I know you hate being told what to do, so I’ll skip that. I would like you to know that someday you’ll laugh about being called a slut when you were a virgin and pity those who teased you for god-knows-what, but I know all of that hurts now. And plus, it makes you a stronger woman. (Just keep your chin up, girl!)

This is all I have: Every decision you are about to make is the right one. Not necessarily at that moment. Or even for the moment after that. You will experience setbacks that you think you’ll never recover from. You will wonder why the hell you were put on this planet.

But know this: The life you have is amazing. And 12 years from where you are now, you are going to look back and not have a single regret. What you do now makes you what you are later. Be confident. You will get what you want, even if it takes a few tries.

I love you. I'm proud of you. Keep up the optimistic attitude. It suits you.

Your friend,

Rebecca

Lunch stimulates my brain--internally and otherwise

Here are some things I learned today:

• Radishes are an excellent food if you are looking to get full without a lot of calories. (Apparently a cup is about 20 calories.) They are also spicy delicious root vegetables that make me think of summer, farmer's market and my friend Jean.
• Tomatoes are a close relative of the plant belladonna (Italian for beautiful woman). Belladonna is poisonous--ingestion of one leaf can be fatal to an adult--and was used in flying powder by witches, according to folklore.
• A serving of spinach has more iron in it than a 6 ounce serving of beef. Veggies unite! But in order for your body to absorb it, it must be combined with Vitamin C. Coincidence that tomatoes and spinach taste so good together? I think not!
• Hummus is one of the oldest known consumed foods in the world.

I learned all this from my lunch. Learning from the things we do everyday is important, and I rejoice every time I have the opportunity.